When growing up didn't feel safe
Perhaps you can't point to a single event. It wasn't one thing that happened — it was the accumulation of many things, over many years. Growing up in an environment where you didn't feel truly safe, seen, or loved in the way you needed. A childhood marked by neglect, emotional unavailability, unpredictability, or abuse. A home where you learned early to make yourself small, to manage other people's feelings, or to simply survive.
The effects of a difficult childhood don't disappear when you become an adult. They show up in how you relate to yourself and others — in patterns that once helped you cope but may now be getting in the way of living the life you want.
If you're looking for a therapist for childhood trauma in Horsham or online across the UK, I'd be glad to hear from you.
You might recognise some of this
- A persistent sense of shame or feeling fundamentally flawed — not just that you did something wrong, but that something is wrong with you
- Difficulty trusting people, even those who are safe and close to you
- Intense emotional reactions that feel hard to explain or control
- A tendency to put others' needs ahead of your own, or to struggle to know what you actually want
- Relationships that follow painful patterns you can't seem to break
- Feeling disconnected from yourself — as if you're watching your own life from a distance
- Chronic anxiety, low mood, or a background sense that something is not right
- A fragmented or unclear sense of who you are
These aren't personality flaws or signs that you're "too much." They are understandable responses to experiences that were genuinely too much — especially for a child who had no other way to cope.
Many people who experienced a difficult childhood, childhood emotional neglect, or emotional and physical abuse don't immediately connect their current struggles to what happened when they were young. What some people come to recognise over time is that these patterns have a name — Complex PTSD, or CPTSD — a way of understanding how repeated relational trauma in childhood can shape the nervous system, the sense of self, and the ability to feel safe in the world. A formal diagnosis isn't necessary to begin this work. If what you've read here resonates, that's enough.
How I work with childhood trauma and CPTSD
Working with early relational trauma and complex PTSD requires particular care. The wounds that form in relationship need to heal in relationship — which is why the therapeutic relationship itself is at the heart of how I work.
I don't push you to revisit painful memories before you're ready. We begin by building safety and trust, developing your capacity to stay grounded when difficult feelings arise, and creating the conditions in which deeper healing can gradually happen. You set the pace. I follow your lead.
My approach draws on Relational Transactional Analysis and psychodynamic thinking — frameworks that are particularly well suited to understanding how adverse childhood experiences shape our sense of self and our patterns in relationships. I work collaboratively, with genuine curiosity about your experience, and deep respect for the resilience it has taken to get you here.
I offer face-to-face childhood trauma therapy in Horsham, West Sussex, and online complex trauma therapy across the UK.
I work with LGBTQ+ clients and my practice is fully affirming. For many LGBTQ+ people, childhood trauma is inseparable from early experiences of shame, rejection, or having to conceal who you are. That experience is welcome and understood here.
Working with me
Individual sessions — £60
Sessions are 50 minutes, weekly, either face-to-face at my therapy room in Warnham near Horsham, or online via a secure video link.
There's no fixed number of sessions. Trauma work is often longer-term, and we'll review how things are going together as we go — always at a pace that feels right for you.
Free initial consultation
I offer a free 20-minute phone or video call before we begin. It's a chance to ask questions, share a little of what's brought you here, and get a sense of whether working together feels like the right fit — with no obligation to continue.
Get in touch
If something here has resonated, I'd be glad to hear from you. Fill in the form below and I'll be in touch within 24 hours.